Monday, January 30, 2012

"Be Nice" Head Banger

I think that God grants us the blessing of forgetfulness. Otherwise, we battle weary mothers would go A.W.O.L. during the toddler years. Yeah, they are very cute, but they are a full-body work out. If my child is head butting me when I get him out of the settings menu of my computer or taking away the box of fruit snacks, he is taking off his diaper and peeing on carpets, counter tops and floor rugs. When I get up the courage to take him out in public, I almost always regret it. So much opinion should not be allowed in a 38 lb. thrashing body of attitude. Thrashing, kicking and using your large cranium as weapons should require a permit, a very hard to qualify for permit.

Don't these young children understand how much their mommies do for them on a daily basis. Do we get any appreciation? No, I tell you. NO! I don't even need verbal reassurance that I am a good Mom, I would be happy with a mandatory break each day as my child actually naps, so that I can collect my faculties. I'm not even sure that I have faculties.

I know that on some level that what I say ad nosium each day must be sinking in a little. Now as my son is hitting me with his hard head he says "Be nice, be nice." I assume that he is referring to his desired behavior and not that he made a "nice" shot, but who knows.

I wish that I could talk to "the powers that be" to have some tighter legislation placed on the behavior of children under the age of five, but who am I kidding? Who is going to take me seriously with peanut butter on my shirt, a frizzy ponytail and blood shot eyes?