Three Year Old Seeks "Wife"

I am standing to the left of our stove grating cheese for dinner, when my three year old son comes over and says "I need a wife." I was a little surprised by this since he's still wearing his sister's dress-up clothes without shame. He really has not asserted himself as a manly man, let alone shown a liking for the opposite sex. Not to mention that he is still too young for marriage. I know that in medieval times people married young but this is a little extreme....Wait a minute, he's pulling on the drawer! The drawer in front of me is where we keep the...knifes. Now that makes more sense. I was using the cheese and he wanted some, so he was looking for a knife, ... not a wife. That's a relief. Well, if you can call seeing a three year old boy with a sharp knife "a relief," that is.

J.B. then says to me, "I need a wife to help me cut the cheese." Wow, can you imagine if that were a true statement. Talk about inadequacy issues. If men needed their wives to cut the cheese (pass gas) for them, what would become of society as we know it? Would women have to start scratching themselves and using phrases like "Dude, pull my finger." Would gender roles become even more confused due to this transfer of power? What a mind boggling concept. I don't even want to go there. That is a concept that I have never understood. Maybe it is a male-domination, hunter vs. hunted thing to be able to defeat a foe with toxic fumes of your own making. Women just think it is vulgar and disgusting. For now though, I think that I will keep my thoughts on the task at hand by focusing on the Monterey Jack and leaving the gender roles of Jack and Jill alone.

"Give me the knife, please, kiddo." This happens too often at our house. He really does like cheese, possibly enough to marry it.